Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
