i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
