walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Operation Purity has been aborted
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
