I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Randomize
