It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
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