yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize