Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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