New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I just found puke in my bra..
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
