I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
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WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
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idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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