She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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