how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize