i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
