Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I don't deserve a penis
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize