Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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