ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
where are you?
Hypothermia
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
