Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
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dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
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So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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