It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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