To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
