bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize