What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
