You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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