There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize