I bet he comes in French.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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