booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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