I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I AM VODKA MAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize