he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize