There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
