why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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