She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
