Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
just found out that she named her cat after me.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
