Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize