did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize