I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize