bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
