yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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