whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize