how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
When are your genitals available?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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