whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
