I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I look better un-naked...
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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