he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
