We're facebook friends in real life
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
