But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
