so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
