from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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