How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize