I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I think people are normalizing furries
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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