She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Houston, we have a squirter
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
