I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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