i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
It was like giving head to a cactus.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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