If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
