At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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